Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Anxiety and depression-the one, two punch!

I will write another post on this god awful depressing subject to satisfy a request by a reader. If depression is hard to describe then anxiety most be the icing on the cake.

Let's talk about anxiety. Now seeing the storm clouds rolling in and hearing the wind pick up during hurricane season causes a certain level of anxiety for a normal person. Genuine concern and a feeling of helplessness. But anxiety as a mental disorder is feeling like that on a sun shiny day! You are in a room full of people laughing and joking and everyone is having a terrific time when suddenly you start to get nervous, you start to sweat, your heart starts to race, your ears start to ring and you have difficulty breathing. It is all you can do not to run out of the room or worse pick up a chair and throw it at a window. That my friends is anxiety.

In my particular case, anxiety usually shows up when I feel inadequate. I feel overwhelmed for some reason. I fail to live up to my promises, I let people down. Failure and anxiety go together for me. Couple that with feelings of hopelessness from the depression and you are experiencing the good old one two punch! What to do? you ask. Well you lay there and hope the bell rings ending the round before the ref counts you out! Can you tell I used to box?

The other thing that triggers an anxiety attack for me is loud "noise". not loud music, noise! A hundred people in a restaurant and they are all trying to talk loud enough to be heard over the music coming out of the ceiling. Screaming children, old people who refuse to acknowledge their hearing loss so they scream at you when they speak. I will get so nervous I want to jump out a window to get away! So far I have resisted that notion.

You see a bear coming at you, what you are feeling is fear!

You think the boogey man might be in the closet, that's anxiety. Irrational fear or fear for no reason. I can be sitting in my recliner working a puzzle in the paper and suddenly get so nervous I have to get up and go outside and walk it off! Imagine getting those feelings in the middle of the night! I can tell you what programs play at 3 a.m.

If these posts sound familiar and you want to share your feelings then by all means tell us your thoughts At least tell me what you think of the articles and make sure to ask for more if that is your desire. Otherwise, I am ready to play some music!

the rat


  1. deadwood cures depression. there is no problem that al swearengen can't solve.

  2. There are a few things I'd like to write about but whether my schedule this morning I will only hit on one now and get to the others later today when I can get back on.

    Your discussion of sensitivity to noise was surprising to me. I have a somewhat similar response and I had not heard of many folks having that. For me, when noise reaches a certain level, it does one of two things... one is where it feels overwhelming and I cannot often think coherently... I become almost lethargic, and cannot focus, feel a great deal of nausea, and everything feels like it is chaos. The other reaction I have is that excessive noise can turn my mood very quickly to one of deep anger and I have a tendency to curse and rage about even the most minor of things. For me, the noises that tend to be the most likely triggers are machinery noises or with people, when there are many people talking all at once around me. For several years now, I have kept a set of ear plugs with me that I sometimes use if it all beomes unbearable or I start to get very, very angry. It is often rally hard to use the earplugs because you get all sorts of odd looks from folks, so I don't use them as much as I should. But then my other strategy ends up being simply to try to leave the situation, but that too is often damn hard to do especially when it is a meeting I have to be at. This noise sensitivity I have is annoying to me and I wish I had a real fix, but I have not yet found one. I had an uncle (now dead) who I wonder if may have had the same thing. He wore hearing aids and fairly often he would purposefully turn the volume off on them in a lot of different situations. It pissed my aunt off a lot, for sometimes he would do it specifically when she was around. He loved her a lot, but sometimes I now think all the noises were perhaps just too much for him and he figured out this way to "tune out".

    More later.


    1. I have often said that if I started to go deaf I would refuse to get hearing aids. Quiet is a treasure. I like classical music at a healthy volume, I'm talking about noise. One of the main reasons I shy away from "civilization" is my dislike for noise. I carry ear plugs also! Never met anyone else who did! Some people raised in the city have never experienced quiet. They have lived their whole lives with that constant static in the background.

    2. I reread your comment. People give you strange looks. So what! I would tell them I am putting these in so I don't go into a murderous rage and kill you! Your welcome!

  3. can't stand noise.
    more and more public places, like restaurants and grocery stores have that screaming noise on loudspeakers.
    it is up so high you cannot concentrate on what your companion is saying, or sometimes concentrate enough to remember to get all that is on your shopping list.
    i used to go into a trance like state in the grocery store when i was alone.
    once, when i finally got home --without what i went for--my husband was so worried because he had had me paged and i didn't respond.
    i never heard it over the din.
    there is one restaurant here which i have quit because the noise is so horrible.
    when we went to mexico there were loudspeakers on the store fronts. extremely annoying.
    it seems the modern america has caught the mexico/negro boombox disease.
    no quiet anywhere.
    i wonder if some of 'road rage' and 'going postal' are from overwrought nerves due to noise pollution.

    1. when I worked on the flight line the noise was so bad you could literally feel it in your teeth! I would start sweating and shaking. I had to give it up. I just couldn't take it anymore.

  4. on the anxiety, a friend was having panic attacks, sweats, et cetera. turned out to be a parathyroid tumor.
    simple operation and she was cured. but it took forever and rounds of many doctors.
    have a blood panel to check minerals. if calcium is low it could be parathyroid.

    1. I'll talk to the doctor on the 25th and see if I can get a test. thanks!


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